A tier list and slightly satirical review of all perks available in the game.
Need for Speed D : I hate this perk with a passion. It's so annoying watching someone run around faster than your full speed, and without any additional perks to offset how bad this one nerfs you, it's basically useless to me. But I suppose the extra speed and annoyance can be at least a little useful.
Nyan shot C: This perk can be great when combined with other perks (mostly for trolling purposes). But you only get 1 at a time and they can all be used up fast.
Fast explosions shot B: This perk is great if you want fast explosion bombs to get an edge over your opponent, but again they get wasted so quickly.
Lilliput shot E: Can be useful at times, but mostly a useless perk.
Invisibility shot B: This perk is great for sneak attacks. Just the same drawback as all the other shots- they get wasted FAST!
Leaden pants D : Saved my rear end from nuke trolls many times, but other than that, it's mostly luck whether you waste it for nothing every round or not.
Berillium helmet A: This perk actually delivers what you want from it. Great for trolling!
Pacifism F: I hate this perk and everyone who uses it. (for legal reasons that's a joke)
Forester B: What?! A perk that actually delivers what you want and doesn't needlessly get wasted for nothing?! How is that even possible??? Great for camping/trolling.
Combat mode A: The only thing keeping this out of the godly S tier is that you can't pick up any gold. So ANNOYING!! Other than that, it's OP as hell.
Shield generator S: If you know how to play 80 seconds without dying, this perk will instantly make you look 10x better than you actually are.
Trick-or-treat bomb A: I thought of giving this one S tier, but I think the recharge time balances it enough to give it an A
Minebomb generator C: I don't like using these, but I suppose they work great if you want to deny someone pluto at the last second.
Ultra bomb B: It's honestly not that OP in most situations. Just run away and you're safe.
Turret C: Unless you put up a million of them, they are so easy to destroy. They have a recharge time too, so AVERAGE perk in my books.
Wrecking F: This perk is so useless that they removed it from the spider boss and replaced it. What more is there to say?
Spider egg D : This perk is kinda cool, but also kinda useless. It's extremely rare, you're lucky if you still have one, so I'll give it a D instead of an E.
Spider transformation S: It literally turns you into a boss and is extremely rare.
Web B: It's a solid perk and delivers what you want.
Boost A: Really good perk and balanced too. One of the only ways to get blue bombs on some maps.
Immunity B: It's like leaden pants. I use it when someone is using it against me. But it delivers value every round, so it's much better than leaden pants.
Exclusive license S: The only way to make any exp progress on this game. Also gives you more items in blocks. I love this perk.
Starter kit B: Not too OP, but definitely gives you a noticeable boost.
Jetpack generator A: This perk is great. You can easily get blue flames, shields, escape suiciders, etc
Miner's luck C: Good perk if you're grinding for gold, great if you're lucky enough to get a pluto.
Bigger backpack A: This perk will give you a noticeable difference in your gameplay, especially if you're new at chaining.
Diamond mimic E: This perk used to be great, but now they've nerfed it so much that it's basically useless unless you get the right map and just hide 100% of the time.
Amplified explosion S: Probably the most OP perk in the game. If you have enough skill to pick up all 8 flames before dying, expect an increase of 10+ KPR over your average on a populated map.
Comments
*Hash sees that Pacifism perk is ranked tier F*
NO! MY FAVORITE PERK.... *Begins to prophesize endless chaos*
*He snaps out of his madness*
Hash: To be a pacifist or not to be-
Hash: What a wonderful perk...
Hash: I'm sure F rank must be the top rank!
*Checks description *
"I hate this perk and everyone who uses it."
Hash: *takes a deep breath*
Hash: Well... he must hate the shield generator as well...
"Shield generator S: If you know how to play 80 seconds without dying, this perk will instantly make you look 10x better than you actually are."
Hash: *begins to laugh hysterically*
Hash: Muahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhaha
Hash equips his pacifism perk
Hash: Pacifism for life!
Hash finds the main source of water in gob, a small puddle and uses his potioneering abilities in conjunction with his very limited knowledge of alchemy to make a new shot perk, meant to resolve his emotional instability - and fuses his true soul with PACIFISM
Hash: It pains me greatly to do this....
He shrieks in terror as a series of repeating spheres trap him, and he slowly freezes in place and fades from existence entering a state of stillness, being temporarily everywhere at once... but nowhere at all, in a spatial crack between the main worlds
ten thousand years later....
Hash awakens!
Hash: For 10,000 years I layed dormant!
Hash: *continues to talk to himself*
The instability has been resolved
Hash: That was close, I almost took the seal off of my hash energy... I might've been done for after that...
His body has went through a qualitative change - forever binding to the existence of pacifism... it would not be an exaggeration to say his fate was tied to it
Hash: Mm-mmm... I don't think I could kill even a minebomb at this level of pacifism!
Hash: Huh? I guess the path of pacifism is one with many turns and setbacks, not allowing one to progress in power... without providing any clear benefits. But it allows the user to enter a certain state of mind, making sure they experience eternal bliss and complete incapability of anger....
Hash notices some text in his minds eye, a repressed memory
"Pacifism F: I hate this perk and everyone who uses it."
Hash: ....
Hash: It... would- seem... I still have a long ways to go in the dao of pacifism!!!!
Hash unlocks the seal on his hash energy.... due to him using the reserves to help Gally score the ultimate goal, his sea of consciousness begins to crack
Hash: Argh!!!
Hash: It... should... be... fine *gasping*
Hash: I'll only need... a minute or two! *coughs up blood*
the scenery changes
Hash had teleported into _Salty_'s node (a sort of temporary realm)
Hash: *makes an attempt to deal a lethal blow in the name of justice!*
_Salty_: (づ。◕‿‿◕。)づ
Hash is blown back! and smashes through Salty's node! His sea of consciousness completely shatters!
Hash: What have you done!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!
Hash: *Grabs his head, while floating through a rift of space outside of the node*
_Salty_: ヽ(〃^▽^〃)ノ
Hash: This was your plan- Wasn't it? Ah!
Hash's existence begins to fade in and out... white spectral hands begin to take hold of him and pull him into a white portal
Hash: *Tries to fight the hands... but slowly succumbs... as he is being pulled to his demise he calls out*
Hash: Salty!!! Answer me!!! Why??? Why??? Why???
_Salty_: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Hash: *Is inside of the portal and it is closing, he is holding on for dear life*
Hash: I won't forgive you! This isn't the end!!! I'll get my revenge...
Hash has been banished, both his cultivation and hash energy stripped, with his right to exist destroyed...
_Salty_ then begins to smile
_Salty_: Hahahahhaahahha!
_Salty_: I really have no idea why he attacked me.... sorry hash.... *shrugs shoulders*
_Salty_: १✌˚◡˚✌५
Salty was then pulled out of his node.... the only thing that could be used to describe what he then saw was two words 'MASSACRE' and 'EXPLOSION'
_Salty_: *As he is being turned into ash*
_Salty_: ....Pwnyy-? Gally? - *he returns back to his node after dying... feeling slightly drained*
_Salty_: Interesting.... the battle still continues... after all of these years...
_Salty_: The vitality of the strong is truly something to not be underestimated!
_Salty_: Luckily my plan is almost complete.... they'll never see it coming!
To be continued...
OP = Over Powered